Living With A Thief
June 2, 2021
June 2, 2021
John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
Many of you know I have been on a journey of overcoming fear. I have made many discoveries while I have been going through this process and I want to share one with you today. I am hoping what I share with you today will set many of you free.
My biggest fear was the fear of rejection. I was so fearful of rejection that I isolated myself from people. I was trapped in a prison of the this fear. I only applied for jobs I knew I would do well at, or had a way in. I only became friends with others who had been rejected. I look back and this impacted every aspect of my life. I ended up wearing masks and slowly taught myself how to become a chameleon so that others would accept me. I learned how to meld into the person each group wanted me to be. It was in high school that I perfected this. The truth was I was slowly losing myself to the fear. This fear had taken my identity.
Unfortunately, this was not the only fear that held me captive. Fear of failure plagued me for most of my adult life. I failed at my first business venture and had to claim bankruptcy at the age of 24. This was a devastating blow. My first marriage ended in divorce and all of my previous relationships ended by being left for someone else, so I was a failure in relationships. When I was in Bible College, I failed a whole semester and had to leave college. This was yet another failure. This fear impacted me in huge ways. I chose paths that I was certain I would be able to succeed at. If I did not think I would succeed I would not even try. I was paralyzed and built a comfort zone out of my inaction. This fear had taken my dreams.
Yet, another fear that also held me captive was the fear that I was just not good enough. This one was engrained from the time I was a child. No matter how good I tried to be, I was always in trouble. I would watch my siblings and when they made mistakes I got in trouble because it was my responsibility to ensure that everything ran smoothly. If my grades were not perfect I heard about it. If I fell asleep in church, I was taught to never do it again. It became my mantra. I was not good enough. It felt like nothing I did was good enough. This continued throughout my life. When things fell apart around me, I felt like I deserved it. This fear had taken my self-worth, my purpose.
The crazy thing is I lived with these fears, I let them take these things from me. I was literally living with a thief. It was slowly destroying my life and my days became routine and life was being drained from me. That is right being held captive by these fears actually stole life and vitality from me. How many times do we allow things like fear to hold us captive while it is robbing us blind. It is literally like fear knocks at the door and we invite it in and when it shackles us to a chair, we watch as everything we have is taken from us. WHY?
Many times we do not realize that we are strong enough to break through the chains that hold us. All we need to do is ask God for his strength to help us. We need to trust God, and allow him to come in and free us. Once we are free then we can start taking back the things that have been taken from us. I have spent years regaining my self-worth, reclaiming my identity, and rediscovering my dreams. This recovery is an ongoing process. The beauty of it is that we do not face this thief alone. We only need to ask God to help and He will be there. When he comes to help he gives us back our life and our vitality. This has been true for me and I am sure it is true for you too.
Personal Note: If you relate to this in any way, I challenge you to ask God to help you to break free and take back the things the thief has stolen from you. You deserve to have a life filled with joy, peace, love and vitality!
Many of you know I have been on a journey of overcoming fear. I have made many discoveries while I have been going through this process and I want to share one with you today. I am hoping what I share with you today will set many of you free.
My biggest fear was the fear of rejection. I was so fearful of rejection that I isolated myself from people. I was trapped in a prison of the this fear. I only applied for jobs I knew I would do well at, or had a way in. I only became friends with others who had been rejected. I look back and this impacted every aspect of my life. I ended up wearing masks and slowly taught myself how to become a chameleon so that others would accept me. I learned how to meld into the person each group wanted me to be. It was in high school that I perfected this. The truth was I was slowly losing myself to the fear. This fear had taken my identity.
Unfortunately, this was not the only fear that held me captive. Fear of failure plagued me for most of my adult life. I failed at my first business venture and had to claim bankruptcy at the age of 24. This was a devastating blow. My first marriage ended in divorce and all of my previous relationships ended by being left for someone else, so I was a failure in relationships. When I was in Bible College, I failed a whole semester and had to leave college. This was yet another failure. This fear impacted me in huge ways. I chose paths that I was certain I would be able to succeed at. If I did not think I would succeed I would not even try. I was paralyzed and built a comfort zone out of my inaction. This fear had taken my dreams.
Yet, another fear that also held me captive was the fear that I was just not good enough. This one was engrained from the time I was a child. No matter how good I tried to be, I was always in trouble. I would watch my siblings and when they made mistakes I got in trouble because it was my responsibility to ensure that everything ran smoothly. If my grades were not perfect I heard about it. If I fell asleep in church, I was taught to never do it again. It became my mantra. I was not good enough. It felt like nothing I did was good enough. This continued throughout my life. When things fell apart around me, I felt like I deserved it. This fear had taken my self-worth, my purpose.
The crazy thing is I lived with these fears, I let them take these things from me. I was literally living with a thief. It was slowly destroying my life and my days became routine and life was being drained from me. That is right being held captive by these fears actually stole life and vitality from me. How many times do we allow things like fear to hold us captive while it is robbing us blind. It is literally like fear knocks at the door and we invite it in and when it shackles us to a chair, we watch as everything we have is taken from us. WHY?
Many times we do not realize that we are strong enough to break through the chains that hold us. All we need to do is ask God for his strength to help us. We need to trust God, and allow him to come in and free us. Once we are free then we can start taking back the things that have been taken from us. I have spent years regaining my self-worth, reclaiming my identity, and rediscovering my dreams. This recovery is an ongoing process. The beauty of it is that we do not face this thief alone. We only need to ask God to help and He will be there. When he comes to help he gives us back our life and our vitality. This has been true for me and I am sure it is true for you too.
Personal Note: If you relate to this in any way, I challenge you to ask God to help you to break free and take back the things the thief has stolen from you. You deserve to have a life filled with joy, peace, love and vitality!