Betrayal sucks! If you have not been betrayed either you are very blessed or you have not allowed anyone close enough to you to betray you. The rest of us, however, feel its affects: broken trust, feelings of abandonment, cracked relationships, fractured self worth, anger, hatred, and bitterness to name a few. The closer people are to us the deeper the damage goes.
Paul experienced this. He faced a judge to plead his case when he was in prison. Everyone abandoned him, they betrayed him. Can you imagine? You are incarcerated and those who are your witnesses don't show up. How devastating would that would be? You would think he would be livid. You would think he would be telling Timothy to avoid these people and if he came across them deal with them accordingly. Instead, he does something that challenged me. He not only forgave them, he asked Timothy to not hold it against them. 2 Timothy 4:16 The first time I was brought before the judge, no one came with me. Everyone abandoned me. May it not be counted against them.
I have been betrayed before and I can honestly say that I have not been as gracious as Paul is in this instance. He challenges me. He saw the bigger picture, that God used this situation for good. 2 Timothy 4:17
But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength so that I might preach the Good News in its entirety for all the Gentiles to hear. And he rescued me from certain death. Paul saw God at work through this circumstance. The next time I am betrayed, I hope I can see the bigger picture and be quick to forgive.
The last few weeks have been hard, but in a good way. God has been gently guiding me to this place where I finally feel like I can start experiencing His fullness in my life. So many people in our world are struggling and they bury it so no one else can see into their shattered worlds. We become shattered when we believe lies, when we allow those lies to become our identity verses who God created us to be. God made us unique and special.
Psalm 139:13-18 states "For You formed my innermost parts; You knit me [together] in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks and praise to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from You, When I was being formed in secret, And intricately and skillfully formed [as if embroidered with many colors] in the depths of the earth. Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were appointed for me, When as yet there was not one of them [even taking shape]. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast the sum of them! If I could count them they would outnumber the sand. When I awake I am still with you." AMP
God's love for us is so amazing and so complete, we do not need to hold onto the lies that we are not good enough, that we are not worthy of God's love or forgiveness, that we are not worthy of love, that if we do enough then maybe we can earn back His grace. These are all lies!!!!! The truth is that the only thing that makes us worthy is God, He sent His son to die on the cross so that we are covered by GRACE!!! When God sees us, He sees us as His children that He designed for a special purpose. He does not see the sin and the lies. We need to let go of shame and guilt, we need to confess and we need to repent (this means to ask for forgiveness and not turn back to the things we are asking Him to forgive). Then we need to forgive ourselves and anyone else we are holding back forgiveness for. This process is hard. It breaks us out of the stagnant lives we are in and brings us back to the vibrant life God designed for us.
John 10:10 sums it up quite well. "The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows]." AMP
God wants us to live lives that are filled with joy, peace and love! He wants us to make the most of every moment and live out this adventure with Him. Those of you who are reading this who feel cocooned in lies or sin or anything else that would hold you back from enjoying life to the fullest, then it may be time to shatter the chains that are holding you back and allow God bring you back into His fullness! Bring you back into enjoying life until it overflows!!!
I know I was going to try to write every day, however due to some computer issues, I have had to make some changes. Until we have a second computer up and running my only day to write for the website is Saturdays. Hopefully this will be cleared up soon and I will be able to go back to my daily blogging.
This morning I woke up and was not feeling well at all. Headache, stomach pains and nausea. Not much fun. However, I got through it. I not only got through it, but I got a lot accomplished. For those of you that are familiar with Connie's Insights, you may have noticed that it has been completely changed. I hope you enjoy the new format. If you have any feedback I welcome it!
Join me on my journey through life's joys and difficulties.