Issue: There are times in my life when I feel alone. I know I am not, however even those I felt I could lean on haven't been there for me. How do I deal with it?
Insight: There have been times in my life I have felt this way, some even recently. There are days when we feel like the whole world rises against us and we are left to stand alone. When this has happened to me, I have gone to God, He is always there for us no matter what we face. The other thing I do is I talk to those who I felt alienated me in those times and explain how I felt. Most of the time I find that the other person either doesn't know their actions impacted me that way or the person feels guilt over what happened. Either way by talking it out not only do you find out what happened on their end but you have the chance to know you are not actually alone. This is a powerful feeling and the most important thing I can share with you is never let this feeling of being alone overwhelm you. When it starts overwhelming someone, that person tends to isolate themselves to protect themselves from it happening again, which only creates more loneliness; this time created by themselves. Be pro-active whenever these types of emotions come over you, it could save you sinking into a pit of loneliness and depression.
Issue: People keep telling me that depression is a sign that I am struggling with my walk with God. I feel like my relationship with God is strong, yet I am still depressed.
Insight: Depression is an issue that has really hit North America hard in the last few years. From my experience depression is no respecter of persons. it can target anyone no matter how close or how far you are away from God.
Depression sometimes has a medical cause, in these cases I would consult a physician in order to receive treatment. In the cases without a medical cause, there are many things that could be the cause and it could take a great deal of time and reflection to discover it. Counseling can be an effective tool in order to discover the cause and be able to deal with it effectively. Another way to discover the cause is to ask God to reveal the cause to you. The one thing to remember is that God will never give us more than we can handle so if he does not reveal the cause to you right away, it may be because you are not strong enough to deal with it at this time.
There are two choices when something like this occurs in our lives, one is to run to God and the other is to run from God. Just remember in this difficult time to continue to run to God. It can be difficult to continue to run to Him if we feel like he is not answering our prayers, however He is listening and He will answer your prayers in the timing that is best for you. His desire is His best for you.
Insight: This is quite a question. The answer you would find our culture is promoting is that sex is a normal facet of any romantic relationship, I disagree. Our culture also promotes the belief that marriage is just a piece of paper and doesn't really mean anything, once again I disagree. Our culture promotes the belief that love is a fleeting emotion and people fall in and out of love all the time, again I disagree.
The Bible is quite clear that sex outside of the covenant of marriage is a sin. The covenant of marriage more than a commitment. A covenant is a sacred agreement between God and man. A marriage covenant is the agreement to be united as one flesh with one another until death, this is an agreement between a woman, a man, and God. Therefore, sex outside of this covenant is sin. It is that simple. The Bible is also clear that love is a choice, not just an emotion. When two people get married they are making the decision to love one another and only one another for the rest of their lives. Jesus commands us to love one another multiple times in his teachings, if love was only an emotion could it be commanded? No.
Now you asked me what my thoughts are, and this paragraph is my answer to that question. From my observations and my own experiences, I can tell you that sex creates a bond between two people and this bond is not easily broken. Sex is meant to join two souls together and when people have sex outside of marriage, this bond tears at the heart and leaves parts of your heart behind and takes parts of the other person's. It is messy and painful. I do not believe that sex can ever be considered casual, I believe that at some point some people's hearts are so tattered, they think to themselves 'What is one more rip?' This is how it gets devalued. In my observations I have seen wonderful people feel like they were worth nothing because they had sex with someone and then that someone walked away. Wonder why depression is rampant in our world, look at what we value. We put more stock in relationships with each other than our relationship with God. Try the reverse and see what happens, you might just be pleasantly surprised.
I strive to help others by being a safe place for others to ask questions and pose issues they face.